Report from the Time Traveler

This is a bunch of (double language warning) fucking shit.

I've been the only person in my group without a Handy (German cell phone) for little over a week now. The program director had to order a new one, flat out, because it was just so old. But he was giving everyone their cell phones personally. Mine? Me, the person who has gone without for little over a week? He gives it to the girl who is most likely to follow everyone around and engage in behavior related to the ominous threat known as "peer pressure." I'm not trying to speak ill of her, but his judgement was a little poor in that respect. So, I am, still surely, without a cell phone for the weekend because I just know she's going to run off to Munich with everyone else with my cell phone locked in her room.

I ask, "What did I do to deserve this?"

*five minutes later* After deleting the overly nasty paragraph I had written, I realized that there's no sense in wasting my breath.

Anyhow, this is my first weekend off and I plan to spend it relaxing as at the moment I only have $76 in my bank account and maybe 50 Euro in my wallet. Oh, and some American notes that aren't worth anything here.

I think I am slowly and unconsciously developing anorexia here. I realized when I took a nap this afternoon that I was dizzy because I hadn't eaten since... lunch yesterday which was only one-third of a doner kabab. Not that's it helping; I'm still the size of a small whale. For those of you who know me, my weight is a large factor in my overly critical evaluation of myself. This trip not excluded.

Maybe it's just me; maybe I wasn't meant to go abroad because I can't act like the Americans foreigners are used to seeing via our media. I can't explain to people that parties are a drag for me, drinking provides no means of entertainment, and staying up late is just wasting my valuable sleep time. Nobody gets that. Instead, I have to go along with things I don't like to do just so I don't seem stuck-up (although I'm not sure how that evalution can be given; there is one girl in particular who is far more blatent about her good fortune than I... and I have none to speak of at the moment). Nobody ever assumes that maybe I'm just quiet and shy. No. They assume I'm stuck up. I, the poor girl with no money and they have oodles to spend and I'm stuck up. This world makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.

I usually try to console myself with the fact that I can pour myself into my studies and research. I try to tell myself to memorize every German vocabulary word in the dictionary... but then my stomach lets me know it has began the process of eating itself alive.

Other than that. Not much has happened. Just the same old stuff. SSDD, you know?

Oh well. Cheers.